Someone remind me to find this post next year and recount every positive thing that has happened.
good things in 2014:
I can drive to Philly without a GPS.
My last day of my miserable job is on the 7th.
I am taking probably the biggest leap of faith in my life.
Random ass beach adventures with iamjeannebopp. See also The quarry.
& most holidays. & Pizza nights.
I got to see jasminebaggins & we took a photo where neither one of us looks ridiculous. We need to see one another more!
I did my first poetry reading ever.
I got my tregus pierced.
I got a tattoo. femmasaurusrex held my hand the whole time. Just like she promised she would.
Haunted house surprise 2k14.
I did 2 5ks.
I taught myself how to cook food.
& I laughed.
It’s easy to get caught up in the stressful things, the things that break your heart & not pay attention to everything good that sneaks in when you aren’t expecting it.
If ur feeling small today I dare you to sit up straighter, look someone who scares u directly in the eye, take up room at the dinner table, make yourself bigger, when ‘sorry’ laps at the back of your tongue, tries to pick up after you, remind yourself that your existence doesn’t demand an apology, that you are allowed to make mess and take up space, do not be afraid to expand. Every single goddamn minute. Expand, expand, expand
i needed this today
well well well. if it isn’t my old friend, the dawning realization that i fucked up real bad
maybe it was fiction,
how i loved her.
it felt fucking real to me.
It’s raining. I’m so god damned sad. I’m contemplating a backslide & just doing what’s expected of me. I’m tired of fighting the fear to be the person I want to be. We all use the future as a way to escape the present; maybe I was never meant to get out of the labyrinth.